Natural Parenting

Consider Eden for a moment…

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What would childbirth have been like?  There obviously weren’t epidurals, or IVs.  You wouldn’t have had to stay in bed, or be limited to eating only “ice chips.”  You could have moved around freely, possibly even dancing during labor.  I think God made it that way for a reason.

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Childbirth is a celebration for women (and, it can be for men too, if they take part!).  It can bring so much joy and empowerment.  Yet, women are scared to death to do it without drugs!  It’s hard to believe that the women in our society want to be numbed during the most amazing experience of their lives.  It upsets me, because so many women are missing out on something that has the potential to change their lives for the better.

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Throughout my pregnancy, I heard/read so many beautiful, natural, drug-free childbirth stories. I was truly amazed by each and every one of them, but none of them could have prepared me for the magical experience of bearing my own child.

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Before having Axel, I didn’t quite understand how other mothers viewed the world. On the surface, I knew that they loved their children more than life, and that they wanted to protect them at all costs, but I didn’t feel it.  I’m so thankful that I get to feel it now.

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All you mommies out there know what I’m talking about.  After your first child is born, it’s like your world is literally flipped upside down. The things you used to value so highly are no longer as important.  All that matters is that precious little baby staring straight into your heart.  God, through my son, has blessed me with a greater ability to love.

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Since I was blessed to have a wonderful birth experience, I thought it might be nice to share it with you all.  I know that there are women out there who don’t know if they have the strength to have a natural birth, but I want them to know that they do.  I hope my story acts as an encouragement for any such women.

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Also, my heart goes out to all the women who tried natural childbirth, only to have it turn out differently than they had hoped.  It’s not easy to continue believing in something even after it’s seemed to fail.  I respect you all a great deal.

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I decided to leave my story unedited, in the format I originally wrote it in a few days after Axel’s birth.  Forgive me if it sounds choppy, I was still recovering, and I was occupied by an amazing little boy. 

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Here it is.

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(Axel’s Birth Story)

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Okay, so on Saturday some of my water broke at about 3am, along with some bloody show.  It leaked a little gush here and there for the next hour or two, but I knew it was just a leak.

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As soon as it happened, though, I started having contractions every 3-5 minutes.  Labor had started.

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I texted my midwife, and she said to just take it easy, and maybe try to go back to sleep, because it was liable to be a while.  Well, my contractions started getting pretty erratic, so my husband and I laid back down at about 4:30am.  I got a fairly painful contraction, so I told him we better just get things ready to go.  I let my midwife know.

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Patrick loaded up the van, and I woke my mom up.  I was REALLY excited at this point, and I thought that the contractions were really neat, because I knew they were going to get my baby out.  We got everything ready, and headed out at a little after 6am, I believe.

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Well, my contractions at that point were 7-10 minutes apart, so we still were assuming we had plenty of time to get to the birth center.  We weren’t in a hurry.

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First, we went to Walmart to get some things.  We bought a movie, and a few music cds, in case we got bored at the birth center.  We also got a few things to snack on.  Whenever I would have a contraction in the store, I would lean on Patrick and just relax my muscles.  (I had read a lot on relaxing my body during contractions, in order to allow the body to open up… I was putting it into practice, and it seemed to help the pain a lot.)  We were taking our time, when out of no where I had a really painful rush (contraction), and it made me moan.  I told Patrick that we better get a move on.

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My midwife texted me, wondering what was up around that point.  I told her we were just running a couple errands before we headed out there.  She said not to rush, and to just let her know when we would be there.

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My rushes were all over the place, and I hadn’t set into a consistent pattern, which gave us the impression that this could take all day.  (It didn’t, lol.)  We drove to Jamba juice after that, at about 7:15am.  They were closed, so we drove to Whole Foods to get some homemade chicken soup for during the labor.  (My midwives recommend it.)  They didn’t open until 8am, so we had to wait about 15 minutes from the time we got there.  Once we got the few things we needed, we finally headed to the birth center, which is a little over an hour away.

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We arrived at about 9:30am.  As soon as we got there, my contractions stalled.  My midwife told me that because I just had a leak in my water, that I could safely go a few days without having the baby.  That was a little discouraging, but I didn’t really worry about it, because I knew that baby was coming soon, and that this was the real thing.

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I wanted to chit chat with my mom and the other midwife (Molly Germash – amazing!), but my midwife (Kelly Miller – awesome!) told me that it would be best for us to try and get some rest before full force labor kicked in.  So, Patrick and I laid in bed, and after about 2 minutes, my contractions started again.  (I hadn’t had one in 30 minutes.)  They were about 2-3 minutes apart.)

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We were in the room in the very back of the birth center, and my midwife was up front.  We waited about 15 minutes just to see if they would stick before getting her.  She poked her head in around then, and asked how things were.  I gave her the update, and she told me, “well, that’s something I’d like you to let me know about.”  Haha.

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She had said a little before then that she didn’t want to ‘routinely’ check me because it’s not necessary.  So we waited until noon, but at that point, we both wanted to see how I was progressing.

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I was handling the contractions well, and laughing about random things in the middle of them.  I hoped I was at 4cm, and not just 3, still. She started my exam, and got this weird look on her face. I asked what was the matter and she said, “uh, you’re 6 cm already.” I was ecstatic! That gave me so much confidence in what I was doing. (I had read Childbirth Without Fear, and in it, it talks about relaxing all of your muscles, and letting your uterus open up without getting tense… it’s supposed to help things move quickly, and make it less painful. It was actually working!)

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She was still doing the internal when I began having a contraction.  She instructed me to just relax my face, all the way down to my toes.  She stayed inside to see how I relaxed for the rush.  At the end of the contraction she was shocked to tell me that I was now over 7cm!  Her and the other midwife were just bewildered.  She said I was doing a wonderful job relaxing, and that my body was doing everything it was supposed to because of it.  I was feeling rather proud at that point, haha.

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I got up after that and walked around for awhile.  During the contractions I would lean on one of those yoga balls and relax.  That helped a lot.

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At about 12:30pm, I started feeling famished.  I HAD to eat.  So, my husband heated me up some chicken soup on the stove, and I ate it.  (Very quickly, might I add.)  It was sooo delicious for some reason, and it refreshed me tremendously.  I felt so rejuvenated after eating it.

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The contractions were starting to get pretty intense, but I still wasn’t to the point of thinking I couldn’t handle it.  A little after 1pm, 59 minutes after I had gotten checked last, my midwife suggested checking my dilation.  I was eager to see if I had made any progress, even though I was thoroughly enjoying the labor still.  (Honestly, it was so awesome!)  She started the internal, and said, “well, you’re 9 1/2 cm now.”  I looked at my husband and we both started laughing.  My midwives joked, saying that I had an over-achiever uterus.

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I told them I wanted to get in the hot tub.  So, they uncovered it and turned on the jets.  I stripped down completely and got in.  (I am forever over the whole ‘modesty’ thing!)  It was heavenly!  (It was about 1:45pm or so.)  I was amazed at how wonderful the water made me feel.

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For the first while I just hung over the side of the tub, and was quiet.  My midwife told me to only push if I got the uncontrollable urge to do so.  I waited… at about 2:15pm, the rushes were getting really powerful, and I felt like I was in another world.  Very weird, but amazing.  I went so deep within myself, and I just silently prayed to God, thanking him for everything, while I concentrated on relaxing.

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I got the urge to push and I told my midwife. She put her hand down by my bottom.  That way, if I was tensing the muscles down there, she could tell me to relax, to try and prevent tearing.

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I pushed, and he came down a lot. (My first push was at almost 2:30pm)  I pushed with each contraction, and he would come out a little, and then go back in.  I felt a tiny bit of his head at one point, which was odd, but neat.  (The position I was in was not helping me get him out, and my water bag was bulging, which meant that it hadn’t burst completely yet. I moved to how my midwife told me to, and she popped my water bag.)
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When I would get tense, my midwife would tell me to relax my kegels, and shockingly, I was actually able to, which was surprising to me.  She told me that on my next contraction to push HARD.  I did just that, actually, I pushed twice for one contraction, and boy did that burn!  RING OF FIRE, now I knew what they meant!  But, with those pushes, his head completely crowned. That was at 2:38 pm., after about 10 minutes of pushing.

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He didn’t have any cord around his neck or anything, so he was just chilling under water until I had another contraction, which wasn’t for 5 minutes! Surprisingly, it didn’t hurt at all at that point.  As soon as his whole head was out, the pain disappeared.  It was surreal.

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Anyway, at 2:43pm, I had a contraction and just pushed him right out.  It felt so weird when his body slid out!  It kind of hurt, but it was more strange than anything.  Oh, and when I was doing the actual pushing, I was on one knee, and on my other foot, so I was kind of half standing, but my bottom was still in the water.  I had been leaning on Patrick that last 15-20 minutes. (The position helped get him out quicker.)

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Patrick caught him, and then helped put him on my stomach.  His cord wasn’t super long, so I couldn’t put him to the breast just yet.  He looked nothing like I thought he would, and a couple times I looked at him like, “who the heck are you?!”  Lol.  He was so amazing, though, even if he was all newborn puffy and blotchy!

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He cried when he came out, but quieted down quickly, as he looked at me and his daddy.  Strangly, neither of us cried.  I always thought I would.

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About 15 minutes later, I started contracting, and I pushed the placenta out.  Now that was cool.  We put it in a bowl next to us (Axel was still attached), and took a picture.  My midwife explained everything about it to us, which was awesome. (It was delicious, too!    Just kidding)

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A few minutes after that, once the cord had stopped pulsating and everything, Patrick snipped it.  My mom ended up holding Axel for the next hour or so, while I got out of the tub and got cleaned up, somewhat.  Axel pooped ALL over her, it was hilarious.  He was crying a lot, but once I finally got him in bed with me, and got him latched on the breast, he was content.

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I was in a dream world, and I still couldn’t believe what was happening. Patrick passed out very quickly.  He was exhausted!  (I asked him later… “how were ‘YOU’ the one who was so tired?!”)

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About 2 hours after the birth, Axel and I took this wonderful herbal bath.  I felt like a new woman after that!  So soothing, it was.  Axel seemed to like it also.

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A couple hours after that we weighed and measured him.  He was 20 1/4 inches long, and 7 lbs, 9 ounces.  He was a perfect little guy.  We hung out for awhile, and finally left for home at about 9:30pm, that night.  It was so nice being able to go home whenever we wanted to.

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It was a wonderful experience, and I can’t wait to do it again, although I still would like to wait until Axel is 3 or 4 years old.  Patrick did an amazing job, and it was so awesome seeing him become a father.

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Now, I can advocate natural childbirth without people saying, “well, you haven’t done it yet, so you’ll change your mind.”  Nope, I’m as solid in my belief as ever, actually, sooo much more so now.  Every woman should try it.  It is so empowering and it really made me trust in my Creator more than ever before.  I loved it, and I love my wonderful son.

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The End.

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As an addition to this story, I just want to say that Axel nursed like a champ right away.  Every part of him was beautiful, and he gets more so everyday.  I am so blessed.

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Please share your birth story with us.  Whether it went well, or not so well, we want to hear about it.  All of our stories are unique, wonderful, and worth sharing with others.

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Thank you for reading my story.

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