Haaaaal-le-lu-jah. Haaaal-le-lu-jah. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. Haaal-leee-luuu-jahh.
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I am back. I am alive. I did not leave the planet. (Although, that would have been interesting.) I am so excited about getting to write again. I have been in zombie mode for the past month with all the paperwork, packing, painting, and a whole bunch of other tasks that begin with the letter “p.” (?)
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The sad truth is that we have SO much to do still. My sweet husband has been out of town for a few weeks. He actually left about three days after we got the keys to our house. Talk about bad timing. We didn’t even manage to get everything moved in before he left, so I spent 5-6 days trying to get things in order. I’m so glad I had some help. My mom did a whole lot of painting, which was an absolute life saver! My sweet sisters, Sarah and Grace, also helped tremendously. It was and still is tough, though. The to-do list never ends.
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Patrick’s going out of town at such an inopportune time was a real wake up call for me. Not only were we in the middle of a big move and “life change,” but I also got something similar to the flu the day after Patrick left. That meant I was left all alone with a rambunctious one year old while I had a fever for 36 hours straight. It was not fun. Unfortunately, because we had moved a lot of our furniture, we were stuck on the floor at my mom’s house for a few days. Fever + 1 year old + no furniture + no husband = not fun. I very quickly realized that I am married to a superb individual. A man who helps me more than I could ever even imagine. I am so blessed. (Now get home already!!!)
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As for this father/husband-less adventure Axel and I are having, it is going fairly well. We have had a few unexpected dilemmas, but that’s to be expected. I’ll share one of the incidents with you. Please discontinue reading if you’re squeamish.
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I found out last week that our sweet little boy loves fresh blueberries. He will go through half a pint in 3-4 minutes, seriously. He enjoys them so much, in fact, that he sometimes bypasses chewing. Maybe a quick “mush” with the gums, but that’s about it.
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So, a day or two after he started the blueberry craze, he had a bowel movement. I, however, was in the kitchen tidying up (<—that’s a lie, but I was in the kitchen doing something!). He was wearing his usual saggy-baggy underwear. Upon entering the living room, I find that he has something in his hands. (Yep, you know what’s coming.) He quite literally had a turd in each palm, squeezed tight mind you. I tried not to panic. I dropped him in the tub and started cleaning his hands. (I actually used the organic baby wash for once!) It was really black and gross, full of WHOLE blueberries. They looked just liked the dehydrated version. (Mmm…)
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I’d love to tell you that that is the end of the story. But, if I did, I’d be lying. What happened next is the terrifying part.
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Fifteen minutes later the entire scene repeated itself, with one exception. This time, Axel decided that he wanted to eat the poo. He was chomping away on those blueberries like they tasted just as good as the first time he ate them. It was horrendous. This time, I freaked out. I even cursed. All I could think to say was, “ahh, Axel… you’re eating your crap!” (I used another word, though.) I mean, I wasn’t yelling or anything, I was just disgusted beyond “clean” words.
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I can now officially say that my child has eaten feces. I should now have automatic acceptance into any and all “mommy” groups. 
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